The worst day ever - in 135 words
Email from friend: Oh, it's all too much. Being an adult sucks. There's way to much to think about. I wish I was a cat. ;)
My response: I was thinking the exact same thing after a visit to the tax agent this morning where I found out I have an unfeasibly huge debt awaiting me - long story but I'm hoping they'll reverse it. Then, after I left the agent's office, I got to my car to find a traffic warden giving me a ticket. Awesome. I may have sworn at the guy, I'm not sure. I blacked out during the blind fury and woke up to find blood everywhere.
Given the way my day has gone, tonight is probably when we'll be told we have three weeks to clear out.
Your cat idea sounds blissful. Except I'm allergic to cats. Can I be ... I dunno... a tiny seashell on a tropical beach? Anything that is easily overlooked and left alone.
these towels are what gets me up in the morning
“Our new towels are so soft, it’s like drying yourself with lambs born in the spring.”
“Mmm, but the towels are better because lambs would wriggle.”
Ignorance is bliss
Last night I sat at the window and watched the thunderstorm that was rolling in about 5kms away. The air was perfectly still and there was only a few drops of heavy rain falling, so it felt quite surreal to hear the constant peal of thunder in the distance and see the steady flash of lightning. Sometimes it was so bright I wondered if it was safe for my eyes. It was such a calming, beautiful experience – to appreciate what was going on around me. I was safely tucked up on the lounge room chair, face peeking out the window, pyjamas on, almost ready for bed. Right at that moment I loved thunderstorms, Sydney and everything about the dark, humid experience. It was my moment of epiphany – clearly I was on the track to becoming a calm, good-natured person.
Just now a huge crack of thunder shook the windows at work, where I’m pushing hard to meet deadline, and I wanted to dive under my desk and hide. I’m dreading the hour-long drive home through peak traffic in heavy rain and have been snarling at the dark sky. Turns out I don’t like thunderstorms, Sydney or humidity all that much. I just cope with them better when I’m about to fall into oblivious sleep.
Where the heart is?
Yesterday marked five years since I left Perth for Sydney and it might have slipped my mind were it not for the dream I had, in which I remembered the anniversary. It feels a little sad now. I always wondered when you stopped counting how long since you had left home. I guess that gradual change occurs around the five-year mark, huh? This year is also a little different because previous anniversaries were more like celebrations; “Wow, I made it to a year”, “Cool, I’ve stuck it out in the big smoke for two years” and so on. Now it feels more like, “I’ve been here so long, I wonder if I’m going back?” And also, “Is this home yet?”
I’m going to need lots of snuggles from my boy tonight. And possibly some Leonard Cohen to really magnify the feelings of self pity.
Apologies - self-indulgence dead ahead
Things to do (a list that should never be published in blogger)
1. Start The Artist's Way ... again
2. Clear the study - it's full of crap and needs to be purged
3. Call parents more
4. Turn off the TV, listen to more music and drink more wine
5. Keep wine locked away when watching Withnail and I (NOT a manifesto on how to live)
6. Put Sofia Coppola on notice (Marie Antoinette - fly-ridden and overblown)
7. Get new camera, experiment
8. Find a new word to replace "absolutely", just say "yes", if necessary
9. Forget about New Year's resolutions, they never make a difference anyway
Labels: lists
Inspiration
Authors whose works will line my bookshelves when I set up my dream office:
(A list in perpetuity)
(And in no particular order)
Joan Didion
Lily Brett
Lewis Carrol
Michael Chabon
Sark
Dorothy Parker
Armistead Maupin
Take a shot
Ohhhh mocha buzz! How you help me get through the day. I don’t usually resort to drastic measures like a shot of caffeine stirred through a normally harmless hot chocolate, but today I NEED it. Must. Have. Extra. Help.
I woke up at 6am today (I couldn’t help but let out a small whimper while writing that short yet torturous sentence) to go training down by the beach. It sounds like such a fun, inspirational, bouncy, energetic, young, go-get-em! kinda thing to do. Especially during the spring months when Bondi beach is at its most breath taking. But this morning was not quite like that. No, this morning was freezing (it snowed in the Blue Mountains overnight and bits of ice could be felt in the air) raining and the ocean was steel grey and stroppy (as was I).
I will concede, however, that training in the morning is much more beneficial than hauling my exhausted body down to the beach in the evening when the small amount of energy I possess at the end of the day is usually only enough to lie on the couch and motion for someone (Russ) to fill up my empty wine glass. Trying to run, box, skip and do push ups on those small reserves? Impossible. Which is why I switched to early mornings.
Now, of course I find myself resisting the urge to crawl beneath my desk to curl up and enjoy a decent half hour nap. Every hour, on the hour. But looming deadlines have put the kibbosh on that idea. Stupid deadlines. So instead I have had to venture to the caffeinated side, which for me is very similar to the dark side, in order to be productive. And jittery. And very, very anxious. And slightly scattered. But productive nonetheless.
